Emmaus

Last weekend I took my journey to Emmaus. For those of you are not sure what Emmaus means you can look up a brief description here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emmaus_Walk

There are so many stories I wish I could share but I can't. I can't because if anyone reading this would want to experience it and I told about my experience it would ruin things. I can say that what I experienced last weekend is almost unexplainable. I've waited a week and I'm still not sure I have the words for it. I'm not sure I'll ever find the words.

I know that since last weekend God has been working on my heart tremendously. I don't feel like the same person and I certainly hope that I am not. However, I think this is going to be a process. Almost a cleansing process of my heart.

I thought I knew how a Christian should act, dress, pray, ect... little did I know I had no idea the heart of Jesus. I had it all wrong. There are many people I wish I could go back and apologize to for the way I acted and for the views I so strongly fought. I had no idea how stubborn I was being or how wrong I was. I felt an overwhelming love by other Christians last weekend. I felt the overwhelming love of God and Jesus and I can only say I strive to be more like that. I actually truly and undoubtedly have a knew passion in my heart...to truly and tenderheartedly love others.

"I might believe in the Redeemer if His followers looked more Redeemed."
-Fredrick Nietczshe

My prayer is that Jesus helps me everyday to be more and more like him. I am far far away from perfect. I will never be perfect. I am just merely striving to have a closer relationship, a stronger faith, and a better heart.

Update

So I haven't blogged in awhile and thought I'd give it a shot again. I'm not sure if anyone really follows my blog but for those of you who might here is an update.

1. I'm glad for the green on the trees, the flowers in the ground, and that it is finally starting to warm up outside.

2. For those of you that don't know...Brian and I moved so things have been kinda crazy for us lately.

3. I'm trying to take down wallpaper so Brian can paint the nursery (the nursery will have a monkey theme).

4. I am in my 3rd trimester of pregnancy. I really enjoy the pregnancy but can't wait for the conversation to be off of the size of my stomach. lol! We are 97% we are going to name the baby Paul. We do not have a middle name picked out yet. And finally, yes I'm nervous about getting him home but can't wait to have him here!

5. I'm really enjoying Monday night small group at the church. If you aren't going you are missing out on some good discussion.

6. I am really enjoying the youth group. I am so sad about the seniors graduating this coming Sunday. I'm so attached. I don't even think most of them know how much I love them and how proud I am of them. They are such a special group of kids!

So, that's a quick update. I hope everyone is enjoying the weather!

I had to play along

You're Inherit the Wind!

by Jerome Lawrence and Robert E. Lee

To you, the learning process is inherently about controversy. If
people aren't having their minds stretched, how could they possibly be learning? This
makes you a good but unpopular teacher, and the people around you are ready to make it
a federal case. All you're asking them to do is evolve a little. But they would like
you to be more creative. You would make an excellent lawyer, even though people think
you love monkeys.


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

Lawyer...hmmm...imagine that. I must be in the right field of work afterall. And, I do kind of think monkeys are cute....but to think we evolved from them isn't all that flattering.

Baby Update

I am in my 5th month of pregnancy, exactly 21 weeks. We found out a week ago that we are having a little boy. He made it pretty obvious. Brian and I are very excited. I love being pregnant. I feel the best I have ever felt. I’m also just very glad that I know it is a boy. He is becoming his own little person and I am falling in love with him and I already know it’s a love like I’ve never experienced before.

Brian felt what he knew for sure was the baby moving yesterday. That was a pretty exciting experience. It’s amazing how we are starting to evolve into feeling like parents.

Now on to the big question…what are we going to name him? Answer: we have no clue. It’s not that we haven’t put thought into it. We have put a lot of thought into this but we just don’t have an answer. We have looked through baby books and nothing just stands out and says “That’s it!” Our heritage is German, Irish, English, and Scottish for the most part. We also like Biblical names. Any suggestions?

I am a Christian

Christians
By Maya Angelou

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin'."
I'm whispering "I was lost,
Now I'm found and forgiven."

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
And need His strength to carry on.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
And need God to clean my mess.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
But, God believes I am worth it.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain.
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.

When I say..."I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner
Who received God's good grace, somehow!

Don't Worry, Be Happy

What am I doing right now? Not sleeping. Why? Because I'm really busy worrying about everything. By everything I really do mean everything. I come from a long line of worriers. I worry over everything...all minor and major details have to be taken into consideration. I know I know..."Give it to God." I have trust me, I really have. Yet I still worry. It's an obsession of mine. I'm obsessed with worrying...how dumb is that?

I've just had some of those days lately. Days that are really bad but have their good days in between. You know the days where everything you touch just rots right there in front of you? I feel like a can't do anything right. So many expectations and so little time to fill all those expectations. And, do you ever try to please someone so much that you just screw it up? I've went about pleasing people in all the wrong ways lately. I assumed what they wanted. It wasn't what they wanted and now I'm worrying about fixing all of that! To others it's probably no big deal...to me and my pregnant mind...END-O'-THE-WORLD!

*Sigh*

Drag your thoughts away from your troubles... by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it. ~Mark Twain