Sunday, September 20, 2009


Last night while driving home from a big day I looked back in the car to find you asleep in your car seat. You looked so precious. I'm so lucky that you are healthy. So many times we take that for granted. So last night I thanked God for giving you to me.

Love you,

Sunday, August 23, 2009

First Year

Almost a month late posting but here is my 1 year letter to Paul.


I can not believe it has been a year since you entered our life. Before you were born a had a lot of people tell me that you would change my life. I knew you would but I didn't know how much. You have had such an impact on your dad and I. I didn't know such love was possible. One day you'll know how I feel.

Your first year of life has brought on so many small victories. Sitting up, rolling, crawling, talking, walking. All in which are things a baby does. However, we are so blessed that you are healthy and able to do all of these things with no hesitation.

You have fit into our life perfectly. And matter of fact have made life more enjoyable. Seeing the world through the eyes of a child again makes even the simplest of things spectacular. Sometimes as an adult you forget to stop and enjoy things (especially God's things) as a spectacular creation.

You are growing so fast. The other day I put you in your car seat and you threw your pacifier. I handed it back to you and you threw it again. I looked at you with those “mother eyes” (I'm sure when you read this later in life you'll know the ones I'm talking about) and said Paul (with some kind of discernment) and you said No and put the pacifier back in your mouth. At age one you already knew the next word that was going to come out of my mouth and decided it wasn't worth it and stuck the pacifier back in your mouth in mutual agreement. Can't wait for what the next few years may bring.


Sunday, April 5, 2009


Looking back on some of these letters I realize they are not well written. However, please remember they are written out of love and someday when you are a pre-teen and you think the whole world is against you (including me) may you read them and realize how loved you are.

That being said, each day is a new adventure with you. You are growing so fast. Life with you is so much fun. It's exciting to see you discover your world.

You and you dad are close "buddies." If daddy is holding you I can usually find you relaxing in his arms playing on the computer or lounging around in a chair. However, some of the sweetest moments are when I see you and daddy sleeping.

My favorite moments with you are playing on the floor. Playing on the floor leads to new discovery. But, my all time favorite moment is when you fall asleep in my arms. You look so peaceful. It's the time of day where all my stress melts away and I reflect on being your mom and you being my baby.


Thursday, February 26, 2009

Dear Paul,

Six months has flown by. It's amazing watching the world unfold before your eyes. You are experiencing and doing so many new things. You roll to get where you need to go, you can pivot on you stomach, sitting in the highchair and eating is no big task now, playing with toys is becoming more fun, and you can really go to town in your bouncy seat. You have been saying words such as mama, lala, uh oh, and on one occasion and one occasion only did you look at your dad, reach out your hand and say "Da". However, because your dad and I were so excited and tried to get you to say again, you simply won't say it.

My prayer life has significantly increased since you have been around. I'm constantly praying for God to keep you safe, to teach me to be a good mother, that you will grow up intelligent, that you will grow up knowing how much your parents love God and therefore may decided to follow him yourself. I love you so very much. I want the best for you. I know that I may not be there to protect you at all times so I ask God to do that for me. I know that sometimes my parenting may fail and I ask God to step in.

The bond I have with you is unlike anything I've ever experienced before. I hope that will never change. You will always be my baby.


Friday, January 23, 2009


I am way behind on my monthly letters to you. I blame the holidays. You are growing faster and faster each day. It does not seem like almost 6 months ago that we were in the hospital with you.

Since the last time I wrote to you, you have explored many new things. You tried your first baby food at Thanksgiving. It was sweet potatoes. It seemed to go well.

You experienced your first Christmas with my side of the family and daddy's side of the family. You received many toys and lots of fun stuff. It's no secret that people love you and just couldn't wait to spoil you.

New Years came and went. You celebrated New Years Eve by watching Horton Hears a Who. You fell asleep in my arms and your dad and I finished the movie : )

Little to your knowledge you were a part of history in the making. The first African American officially became the President Elect on January 20, 2009. I wonder if you will later read his inauguration speech in your history books.

As far as development goes you are gradually making progress. You are now rolling from your belly to your back, putting the pacifier in your own mouth, sitting up on your own (for the most part), and trying to become my helper as I feed you baby food. I believe your favorite baby foods so far are pears, oatmeal with apples and bananas, and green beans.

Your favorite toy right now is probably a horse with a bouncy seat in the middle that Grandma Rittenour bought for you for Christmas and a toy zoo with lights and sounds that daddy and I bought for you.

I am looking forward to the new adventures that month 6 will bring.


Wednesday, November 5, 2008


You are now 3 months old and growing like crazy. At your last doctors appointment on October 31, 2008 you weighed in at a whopping 15 pounds and 2 oz. You have learned to hold your head up, blow amazing spit bubbles, giggle, turn your head when you realize your daddy or myself are in the room, hold your own rattle, and you are trying to sit up but you still have support. You are also trying to roll on your are so close you almost have it. I can't wait for that day! Among the many things you are learning and doing you are also starting to cut your first teeth.

You experienced your first Halloween dressed as a monkey. You looked adorable in your monkey suit. Grandma Kim, Pap, Aunt Lori, Uncle Dave, and Cousin Connor were among your adoring fans that came to see you dressed up and pass out Halloween Candy. You also had a few visitors: Sherry, Danny, Dylan, Lauren, Jenn, Ellie, Silas, and Sarah. You tolerated your costume well. You eventually got bored with Halloween and feel asleep.

Although you have no idea, you have witnessed a major turning point in our Country. Barack Obama was elected America's first African American president.

I am enjoying each month with you. I enjoy watching your many milestones. I am on the sidelines cheering you on as you explore your new world and learn new things!

I love you!


Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Love will find a way

"I have been surprised to find that I am given more life, more hope, more moments of buoyancy and redemption, the more I give up. The more I let go, do without, reduce, the more I feel rich. The more I let people be who they are instead of cramming them into what I need from them, the more surprised I am by their beauty and depth." -Shauna Niequist, Cold Tangerines.